duality.. if the pain goes on, i'm not gonna make it!!!

I push my fingers into my eyes...

It's the only thing that slowly stops the ache...

But it's made of all the things I have to take...

Jesus, it never ends, it works it's way inside...

If the pain goes on...

Aaaaaaaah!

I have screamed until my veins collapsed

I've waited as my time's elapsed

Now, All I do is live with so much fate

I've wished for this, I've bitched at that

I've left behind this little fact:

You cannot kill what you did not create

I've gotta say what I've gotta say

And then I swear I'll go away

But I can't promise you'll enjoy the noise

I guess I'll save the best for last

My future seems like one big past

You're left with me 'cause you left me no choice

I push my fingers into my eyes

It's the only thing that slowly stops the ache

If the pain goes on,

I'm not gonna make it!

Pull me back together

Or separate the skin from bone

Leave me all the Pieces,

then you can leave me alone

Tell me the reality

is better than the dream

But I found out the hard way,

Nothing is what it seems!

I push my fingers into my eyes

It's the only thing that slowly stops the ache

But it's made of all the thing I have to take

Jesus, it never ends, it works it's way inside

If the pain goes on,

I'm not gonna make it!

All I've got...all I've got is insane...

All I've got...all I've got is insane...

All I've got...all I've got is insane!

All I've got...all I've got is insane!

I push my fingers into my eyes

It's the only thing that slowly stops the ache

But it's made of all the thing I have to take

Jesus, it never ends, it works it's way inside

If the pain goes on,

I'm not gonna make it!

1st day of the chinese calender

hahas.. today was fantastic!! other than the many red hong baos i received, there was good food again!! eg: sea cucumber soup, black sauced noodles, roasted chicken, roasted duck, roasted pork, brocolli, bee hoon!! hahas.. and not forgetting all my wonderful cousins that came..

i estimated that about 40-50 relatives were in my house today.. and that's only my dad's side!!! wahahaha.. and i received about 10-15 red packets.. of which quite a few are 20s and my parents gave me $XXX.. hahas.. figure that out yourself.. and tonight i'm still gonna be going to my mum's side for dinner!!! now this looks promising.............. evil grin.. hahas..

dong dong chiang!!!

hahas.. chinese near year is just less than 5 hours away!! means less than 5 hours to be receiving many red packets!!! wahahah.. okok.. chinese new year is not all about red packets.. it's about many many things that i can't reali remember.. hahas..

mr ong is gonna have a steamboat with his family, and so is sandra. as for me, i'm gonna have sea cucumber with black sauced duck, sliced abalone, fried yellow noodles, mixed vegetables, pig's stomach soup and.. erm, i can't reali remember. hahas.. ya. so i'm just waiting for dinner to be ready!! hahas.. Xin Nian Kuai Le!!

when..

yesterday was great!! after the "Chong Boon Idol".. chris, cheng hao, sung lee, celine and jacky went to meet edmund they all..went to the food court at scotts basement.. slacked around for a while before taking our time to walk to far east for a while..

edmund wanted to go to china black which was across the road so we made our way there.. stopped at the nike shop before moving on to wheelock place.. i like going there cos it's quieter and more peaceful.. we all went to borders and looked at books.. i wanna buy a series of unfortunate events book twelve!! hahas..

we were all tired and thirsty so we managed to walk to mcafe at shaw centre.. i had a iced choclate which was great!!!hahas.. we were all too tired so we ended up going home

vanquished..

haiz.. i've finally made up my mind.. i cant stop day dreaming of ***.. hahas.. feeling a bit better.. on thursday we went to nanyang poly which is so boring.. first of all.. the whole open house was poorly organised.. so there were like practically jams everywhere.. saw a few of my primary school frens though.. hahas.. to dae was quite fun.. met the ex co at j8 in the morning.. christopher and i had the mee sua from the taiwan street snack shop thing.. not bad.. then we shared the XXL Chicken which was so salty..

then we all walked to bishan sports complex.. we actually had badminton in mind.. but when we reached there.. it was full!! so we ended playing along the wide corridor.. christopher and rekha plays very awkwardly..! rekha is squating down to play while chris is playing with the floor half the time.. hahas.. left with shawn at 1215.. he went for jamming and i went for training.. todae's training was ok la.. not that good, not that bad..

then went home.. took my bath and watched tv.. ended falling asleep while wacthing.. still thinking of ***.. hahas.. ***.. ***.. ***

emotional haphazard.. damn it..

first of all.. i'm so freaking tired cos i spent hours last night talking to the ex co and shu yin.. talking crap and stuff like that.. and i tot all my emotions were settled.. till this afternoon.. i was suddenly so taken in by my thoughts and emotions that i felt so depressed.. but i still had to pull through.. feel a bit better thanks to shawn and shu yin.. thanks man.. and jacky boy for cheering me up.. but i'm happy wif my solo for spanish trumpet..

skool.. work.. stress..

guess wat.. skool has reopened for one boring week.. one spectacularly boring week.. been praticing my spanish trumpet song.. come to metier six to find out.. haiz.. bored bored bored.. i'm so freaking bored.. gotta start studying soon.. o levels will be here be for i noe it.. haiz.. still training hard at badminton.. todae was as usual.. Boring!!! haiz.. tmr is a holidae.. maybe will be goin out.. lols..

NeW YeAr.!!!

hahas.. it's the 1st of january!! hope to start afresh this year.. oh ya.. i also wanna noe who is this emmanuel guy on my tag board.. anyway.. who cares about him.. Happy New Year everyone!!!!